Thursday, January 17, 2013

thusday early morning

Gazza is having a peaceful night. He said before that 'I was panicked yesterday but tonight I'm not'.
We just had a lovely hug and he looked in my eyes and smiled. It was so good. I love him so much, it is truly what people call heartbreaking.
Hi temp is rising slightly because of the infection in his lungs which is no longer being treated. He is not in any pain and looks beautiful. I can hear him breathing from where I am typing it is  a lovely sound.
Tomorrow we are hopefully transferring to the hospice. Gary very keen on this.
To be very clear for people who are confused. Garys disease has progressed extremely quickly and his lungs are filled with tumours and fluid.The treatment options were invasive and did not guarantee any relief from pain. They  possibly would have extended his life by a couple of weeks but nothing was certain.
Gary made the decison for no more proceedures. Post admission he was tested ,scanned ,poked with so many needles he was exhasted and saddend by it and the prospect of further intervention.He was seen by a huge team of very caring and professional people.They were fantastic.
Gary lived every moment fully right up admission.
He was singing along tonight with Sue on her Guitair and the kids.


  1. Heya Kat,
    Way back in the day, I had a complete mental breakdown. I approached Gary one day and said I couldn't possibly work another day. Gary was super-supportive. I couldn't have asked for anything more from and employer and a friend.

    I took a lot of time of work and ended up in Ashburn Clinic for five months. Gary visited me there and was very supportive.

    I got out. Tried to work again. Failed. Resigned from Enabling and headed out during various volunteer type things.

    We ended up building a solar powered school in Uganda. I placed the following signs on the side of the building to acknowledge the mental health professionals who kept me safe and help make me sane.

    In September 2013, we plan the construction of another solar powered school in Nepal.

    When it is done, we'll put a plaque on the side that reads:

    "Made possible by Gary Taiaroa"

    Because without his understanding and willingness to give me the time I needed off work, I don't think any of this would have been possible,

    Much love.


  2. Sounds like you are doing all the right things with this precious time. So glad to hear Sue has the guitar out! XX Donna

  3. Thinking of you kat, Hana Mac and zac! All my love
    To Gary xx mum& dad (sue and gra) have been keeping me updated!
    Your so strong kat, hopefully I'll get to see you when I'm in dunedin in a few weeks, your constantly in my thoughts!
    Love you guys,
    Gary thinking of you always!!!!
    Travel well xxx
    All my love, Georgia xxx

  4. Loads of love to you all xxxxx
    Scott and Paula

  5. All our thoughts are with you Kat and the family. Nothing to say but all our love. Big hug for GT.

  6. Loads of love to you Gary, Kat and beautiful family. There is so much love being sent to you right now XXX
    Diana, Tony, Freya Jake, Sam.

  7. I'm a 32 year old mom of 3 girls 12,9 & 2.5. I don't know you , but my prayers are with you. I've been following your husbands blog ever since my husband was diagnosed with synovial sarcoma. He just turned 35. Your husband has been an inspiration to me and has helped me understand things better. God bless you and your children and your wonderfully whitty husband :)

  8. Kia Kaha Gary, Kat and family! That's one expression you taught me, Gary. I will not forget it :-)

  9. Gary, Kat and Family - I'm guessing the three Fs are probably more important now than ever. Faith. Family. Friends. You have a life blessed by all of them.

    Gary, you have always led by example and so many lives are richer for having had you as part of them. Go well and in peace.

    xxx Jo

    Jo White

  10. Gary you are a most inspiring person. You and your family are all in my thoughts.


  11. Gary, you have shown true courage and strength, along with your persistent positive attitude, if we can all take a little piece of that from you as you depart, the world will be a better place. Barbara is bringing you a hug from me tonight.
    Jodi x

  12. Gary, I'm glad we met. You have been an inspiration both professionally and personally and the world will be a poorer place without you.

    I wish you strength for the final leg of your journey and my thoughts and prayers go out to you, Kat and the kids.

    Bye mate

    Ian & Shiree

  13. Our thoughts are with you and Kat my dear old mate - You fought hard and you fought bravely .
    Love Twissy , Sarah , Libby , Jackson and Eloise

  14. Hello Gary and Family,

    You guys are very inspiring to me. I read your messages and look at the pictures you post and I see a warm and loving family, of people who laugh and love easily, and are in touch with nature and friends. Given half a chance Gary, you will deliver your unique brand of witt :-) You have created a legacy of strenght and courage to be admired, thank you for sharing that with everyone.

    Love and Hugs to you all,

    Martin Trumpelmann

  15. Hi Gary - thinking of you, Kat and family. It was always good to have a talk and a laugh - so pleased we made the deck bigger. Your courage and positive outlook on life has been an inspiration to us. Heaps of love to you, Kat and family.
    xxx Peter & Frizzle

  16. Hi Gary, our thoughts are with you and your family.

    Mark Green

  17. My thoughts are with you and your family Kat. You guys have been such an inspiration to me and my wee family while we were dealing with this disease. And I'm sure how you all deal with the coming weeks will continue to inspire us. Love from Scotland x

  18. Gary - I didn't work with you long but I was very impressed with your eloquence, professionalism and common decency.
    My thoughts are with you and your family.
    Paul Shepherd

  19. Kia kaha Taiaroa whanau.Sending all of you lots of loving thoughts.
    Bernadette and Mark

  20. Hi Gary, our thoughts are with you, Kat and the family. You continue to inspire us.
    Steve Fouche

  21. Dear Gary, Kat, and your beautiful family. I am at such a loss for the right words to say. You have all given me such courage and faith that there is still a concept of a truly happy family. You are all incredible and my life is so much richer having had you in it Gary. You have helped grow me as a person and as a professional and for that I will be eternally grateful. My deepest love and support is with you all right now, you are in our thoughts and hearts.

  22. Hi Gary and Kat, we are sending all our love,hugs,and prayers to you both.
    Words can't describe how sad we feel to be hearing this latest news. Gary you are an inspirational friend who we will never forget. Love and hugs, Frank and Eilleen Garth xxx

  23. Hi GT, Kat & family, just heard the news. GT you're one of the most inspirational people that I've ever met ... and our trip to Edendale will be forever etched in my memory! I gets bigger & more elaborate with every telling :) We're thinking of you all, lots of love Timmsy.

  24. I didn't work with you very long either Gary, however your courageous struggle was drawn to our notice not long after I started.

    I can say that the latest mews has been met with great dismay at the Auckland office. Sobering and humbling. Thank you for sharing all on this web site.

    There has never been a better time for the rest of us to count our blessings and to remember to live each day to full as you have been doing as best you can. This is a message I have shared with my own family, who join me in extending warmest greetings to you all.

    George Burrell

  25. Gary, Kat and family, not a lot to add to everyone's accolades. Big hugs and love to you all.
    Elizabeth Sandford xxxxx

  26. As a typical man the reality of your situation has taken an age to sink in to my mind Gary. I have fond memories of you mate, able to sink Amstel Lights better than any of the rugby boys and yet such a wonderful doting Dad to Arihana (and the later troop of Tairaoas) and hubbie to Kat. Thanks also for teaching me to sail on that great Yacht we had in Tortola, one hand on the tiller, one hand clutching a cold beer, our kind of sailing! Fiona and I will always remember you as one of the handful of people who came to our wedding on Peter Island (28th May 1993 I think?) as well as the person who helped us so much in getting settled into crazy BVI life. Also so glad we were able to spend some time together when you all came to see us in Geneva a few years back. I lost my dear brother Paully in November last year (another one of the handful of wedding guests) so am learning how to hold a place for people dear to me in my mind beyond their time with us. Circumstances meant that we only knew each other a couple of years Gary but you were one of those that I’ll keep a place for (your friendly smile, cheeky comment, ribbing me about All Black supremacy). Big hug from me Gary. Love Johnny Morris.

  27. Hi Gary and Kat,
    I'm just thinking of the last time I saw you guys at Sue and Graeme's wedding party. You were both so beautiful and happy. You had this funky shirt on Gary, and your cheeky smile to match. We all had a great boogie!
    Mum has just told be about this blog and the bits I've read so far have been truly inspirational. I love the pic you just put up of you two. Stunning!
    Thinking of you and Kat and the rest of the fam.
    Lots and lots of love,
    Liv (Raffills)


Thanks for your comments Gaz